Imagine you just received your most awaited salary. You can now buy that thing that you have been eyeing for so long. You go to the mall or wherever the hell you can find that something that you have always dreamed about. Finally, you are at the doorstep of that special place. You can finally have it, after months of saving up for it, you can finally own that thing. Except that you don’t want it anymore. You no longer feel like it’s worth it. That thing that seemed as a necessity before, now feels like just a mere want in your life. So you veer away from the place and find a new thing that entices you. This new thing feels like it is what you have been waiting for so long, and when you can finally have it, you lose the interest again, and again, and again. And you are stuck in this cycle, feeling lost. That is what quarter-life crisis feels like — a limbo, a purgatory, a place where there are no directions, just several forks in the road.
Just like many other people of my age out there, I experienced this crisis. I cannot say that I am over it, but I think I have already learned to keep it at bay. What helped me during these times are the articles and books by Mark Manson. My most favorite article is entitled Screw Finding Your Passion, which debunks the myth that we need to find our passion in order for us to be happy.
I used to see myself as a professional doctor — fully dressed in white, working in a hospital, or in a clinic, treating patients and diagnosing illnesses. In my head, I will be like Dr. House, who seems capable of treating the most obscure illness there is. It seemed like a pretty cool job. It felt like it was my passion, job that will make me happy, and a dream that I needed to fulfill. But when reality bites, boy it stings and it stings like a freakin’ giant arthropod. Long story short, I realized that the medical profession is not for me, not because I am weak but because I am not interested with the process needed in order to get there. I am just interested with the result. I am interested with the degree, with all the benefits that comes with, but I am not interested with long hours of sleepless nights, exams, and whatnot. I am not in love with the process. I am only in love with the result.
I salute all med students who, though already on the verge of giving up, still continue to study because they feel that what they do is worth it and meaningful. I actually follow MaartistMD on Twitter and this Twitter account shares comic relief on being medical students. You should check their Twitter account. This afternoon, I cleaned my room and saw the MSA NMAT Reviewer that I bought last year when I decided that I wanted to enter med school but as since I no longer need them anymore, I felt the need to give it away to those who really need it.
It is an MSA NMAT Reviewer Revised Edition 2014 with practice sets on Chemistry, Physics, Quantitative Reasoning, Inductive Reasoning, Perceptual Acuity, Biology, General Reviewer, and Companion Volume Answers and Explanations.
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